I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
