angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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