And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
