Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
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when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
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so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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