I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
