I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
