All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
