apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Randomize
