if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
