It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
and you fell through a lawn chair
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Randomize
