I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
