I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Randomize
