The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
