Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
