last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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