he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Randomize