grandma shit on top of the toilet
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
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