i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
