I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
