I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
