The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
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