You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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