We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize