I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
