she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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