dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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