Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize