Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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