I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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