this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
last night I used snow as a chaser
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
