I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
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