You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Randomize
