Can Purell be used as lube?
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
