I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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