Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
