I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
how does that bad decision feel?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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