I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
