So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
