my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
