Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize