I'm really into asian looking animals
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
This beer is not sobering me up at all
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
