so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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