Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
