you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
