We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
