Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize