he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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