my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
