Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
