Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
